January 2, 2022

World’s Largest Ball of String Ain’t Nothin’: Tale of COVID Grief

Opening Pseudo-Scientific Fact: Weighing 3,712 pounds, this ball of string is 24,901.461 times lighter than the heartache currently being experienced by one single compassionate human. I tried to push the pain away and it rolled down a hill. Sorrow picked up twigs and dimes, growing in diameter. I put it in a casket pushing on the lid, squeezing out the tears I hadn’t yet shed. We floated to Lake Erie, my globe of grief and me. We scooped up dying leaves, swirling in damp misery. I cried out to Atlas, asked him for some aid. I’m sorry, friend, he told

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